Birthday & fang seng

The day that was : 19 November 2010

Friday, I was home nursing a fever.
after some rest and deliberately avoiding medicine,
I drove to the Tamu in Penampang,
along with my sister,
to purchase fishes for fang seng .

It was my birthday,
and I would like to release lives to celebrate this day,
a spiritual activity that I embrace in the calendar of my life.

We bought about 19 small plastic bags of ikan karuk ,
and a bag of ikan keli,
it’s ironic that the Kadazan lady selling the fishes would later offer an additional plastic bag of ikan karuk,
saying ` tolong saya lepaskan’. Even though I did not mention that we were going for fang seng.
Guess she just knew.
If I had my will, I would ask her not to capture them again,
but who am I to ask a non-believer to stop their trade,
probably the very source to their livelihood?

We then drove to a nearby river,
in the stiffling afternoon ,
I felt realy sick and tired .
But it did not deter my resolve to carry bags of fishes down to the river bank,
where a little prayers were said,
before releasing them to the cool and soothing river,
then witnessing the small creatures slowly and graciously swim to the deeper part of the dark flowing water
back to where they belong.

Later my sister said `let’s go buy some cupcakes for your birthday ,I belanja .’
Then stopped by a kopitiam for teh-c , teh-c ping and some bread,
before heading home for a rest.

It’s been a quiet birthday, despite a little emotional turmoil etched inside my heart.

But time is always a reliable healer, this soon will pass.

I pray on this day for the renewal and rejuvenation of the mind, body and spirit, to enable me to bravely embrace yet another chapter in this life journey..


Some fang seng pictures:
Bags of ikan karuk
Reciting prayers

I like how the sun was shining down its glistening rays of light onto the water, and when it touched the river surface a mirage was formed its presence immediately brought forth a sense of peace and tranquility to its surroundings, while my sister stood unfazed by the blistering heat reciting verses of prayer to the tiny lives being released into the water.

It is to me a heart-warming and endearing sight.